When I was 13 I was enrolled into a boarding school and was sent hundreds of kilometers away from the most comfortable space I called 'home'.
I then realized that that was the most profound turning point that brought me where I am today, to which I would never change, whatever comes my way. I am exactly where I want to be. But that story is for another day.
I also learned that there actually was magic, if not in its real form, to which I have been fed before then but in the form of literature. We know it by the name of 'WORD'. Yes, at the boarding school I learned, that there are 5 magic words.
The initials of the 5s are S.T.E.P.S, but the greatness of each was in no particular order. Now is where I am going to tell you what are the steps.
S- Salam
T- THANK YOU
E- Excuse me
P- Please
S- Sorry
Where are the magic? You might ask. But trust me, the magic of these words lie in our daily lives, instilled in our very being, only if we know where and how to use it. But the most important is, whether or not we use it.
Anyway today I'm gonna just emphasize on one magic word and let you folks figure out the rest by yourselves.
See the one with ALL CAPS? Yes that one.
I find it very irritating and disgusting when people who should be using that word during certain times in their lives fail to utter the very simple two syllables.
I also find it repulsive to these people who earn what they desire or just receiving something that helped them in any ways but have no common sense of saying it, let alone trying to pay the debt as a symbolic gesture.
I always admire the wests, and also the Japanese, in some ways because most of them, they breath the word 'thank you' like its almost the air they 'exhale' after they 'inhale' kind deed from other people.
This habit of saying thank you is what I think a humble human being should have in their core, as their base, in whatever way they wish to express it.
Sadly, this is not common from where I belong, literally and definitely, figuratively.
Tuesday, June 12, 2018
Monday, May 21, 2018
An evening on the beach
The four of us were sitting on the edge of a beach, with our little diaries
in our hands, writing our hearts out. The girls were using their favorite
color pencils while we borrowed some of theirs that they left in the box.
in our hands, writing our hearts out. The girls were using their favorite
color pencils while we borrowed some of theirs that they left in the box.
We wrote how the day started, the places we visited, and the people we met.
I glanced at Sarina's page and saw little drawings of us 4 blended with
the Sun and the Sea and I felt warmth in my heart.
Then I took another glance at Arisa's and I saw more use of
the Sun and the Sea and I felt warmth in my heart.
Then I took another glance at Arisa's and I saw more use of
new words written in it, and I felt a hint of proud in me.
They are taking our world by storm, these two.
From the day they were born and
From the day they were born and
I pray they will never cease to do so.
And then I asked them to write something important, I said.
And then I asked them to write something important, I said.
This time I told them to think hard and take as long as they wanted to
and Mommy will wait until they decide that they are done.
and Mommy will wait until they decide that they are done.
This statement, I read it in a book written by Stephen Covey a few years ago.
I learned to write a personal mission statement of myself at that time so
I'd be a better person in the future, a person who is proactive instead of reactive,
who begins everything in her life with the end in her mind.
This one page instilled in me a sense of mission, a sense of clarity,
organization and commitment, exhilaration and freedom.
I'd be a better person in the future, a person who is proactive instead of reactive,
who begins everything in her life with the end in her mind.
This one page instilled in me a sense of mission, a sense of clarity,
organization and commitment, exhilaration and freedom.
I hope that this page also help my girls to feel the same and help them in their life throughout with choices that they will face, with problem that they will encounter, and with people that they will meet.
Saturday, March 10, 2018
Motherhood
Title sounds so cliche (among my group of friends of same age) but surprisingly, that's been going on with my life now.
It's 12:52 sharp Malaysia time right now while I am typing this very sentence, and by this time 1 month and 2 weeks ago I was in labor, fighting for my dear life and my two little girls in me.
46 days ago I gave birth to a pair of beautiful baby girls in my birthplace, Kuala Lumpur. My eldest daughter was born at 1:49 am and one minute later at 1:50 my youngest came out, Alhamdulillah healthy. They were on their 38th week that day, where the physicians in HKL confirmed that a pair of monochorionic/diamniotic (mo-di) identical twins are at higher risk of multiple complications including fatality if not to be taken out if not yet born naturally. I was admitted January 21st on Sunday and scheduled for an induction the next day.
My water broke at 12 in the afternoon of 22nd January by a physician's hand-crafted painful 'poke' which I requested an epidural to accompany the much anticipated contractions to come. The opening was at 3cm approximately and I was told to have 7cm more to go until I should start feeling a gush of 'fake bowel movement'.
I started pushing around 12 midnight but was taken to the operation theatre for an emergency Cesarean Section after 1 hour of excruciating pain. My epidural tube was not working (they later decided there has been a leakage on their part) and I was put to sleep during the whole process. Naturally, I did not had my skin-to-skin with my newborn daughters right after they kissed my belly goodbye.
By the time I woke up, my husband was on my right bedside and two tiny-red-colored human were on my left. My face was stuffed with oxygen to help me breathe, and I found myself very tired and not able to produce sound like I normally do. My voice did not come out properly and I couldn't bare to move since the pain around my abdomen was surfacing.
My brand-new daughters and I were detained for 1 week (due to the girls' showing symptoms of Jaundice) at the hospital which during it my husband especially and parents helped me throughout the most confusing; I must say, and painful days I have ever been in my life.
Fast forward today, they are still helping me coping with this new amazing God-given joy that anyone could ever ask for. I must see myself put them before me and anything else in the future hoping that I could ever pay it back to them for what they have done for me.
I am almost recovered from the pain and post-operative wound, can walk and sit like I used to, but to a certain amount of speed or else I would start feeling uncomfortable right beyond the surgery incision.
We are loving every bit of parenthood (grandparenthood in my parents' case) and could not ask for more. Sleepless nights and first time parent's argument are all worth it when the twin flash us their untimely baby smile here and there when being attended to.
I pray to God to give me enough time to see the girls grow up to be someone strong, recognized in His heaven's community, in their lifetime and in the hereafter, and I am looking forward to be a better person because of them.
My favorite mantra in this journey is; 'Strong women...may we know them, may we be them, may we raise them'.
Amin.
It's 12:52 sharp Malaysia time right now while I am typing this very sentence, and by this time 1 month and 2 weeks ago I was in labor, fighting for my dear life and my two little girls in me.
46 days ago I gave birth to a pair of beautiful baby girls in my birthplace, Kuala Lumpur. My eldest daughter was born at 1:49 am and one minute later at 1:50 my youngest came out, Alhamdulillah healthy. They were on their 38th week that day, where the physicians in HKL confirmed that a pair of monochorionic/diamniotic (mo-di) identical twins are at higher risk of multiple complications including fatality if not to be taken out if not yet born naturally. I was admitted January 21st on Sunday and scheduled for an induction the next day.
My water broke at 12 in the afternoon of 22nd January by a physician's hand-crafted painful 'poke' which I requested an epidural to accompany the much anticipated contractions to come. The opening was at 3cm approximately and I was told to have 7cm more to go until I should start feeling a gush of 'fake bowel movement'.
I started pushing around 12 midnight but was taken to the operation theatre for an emergency Cesarean Section after 1 hour of excruciating pain. My epidural tube was not working (they later decided there has been a leakage on their part) and I was put to sleep during the whole process. Naturally, I did not had my skin-to-skin with my newborn daughters right after they kissed my belly goodbye.
By the time I woke up, my husband was on my right bedside and two tiny-red-colored human were on my left. My face was stuffed with oxygen to help me breathe, and I found myself very tired and not able to produce sound like I normally do. My voice did not come out properly and I couldn't bare to move since the pain around my abdomen was surfacing.
My brand-new daughters and I were detained for 1 week (due to the girls' showing symptoms of Jaundice) at the hospital which during it my husband especially and parents helped me throughout the most confusing; I must say, and painful days I have ever been in my life.
Fast forward today, they are still helping me coping with this new amazing God-given joy that anyone could ever ask for. I must see myself put them before me and anything else in the future hoping that I could ever pay it back to them for what they have done for me.
I am almost recovered from the pain and post-operative wound, can walk and sit like I used to, but to a certain amount of speed or else I would start feeling uncomfortable right beyond the surgery incision.
We are loving every bit of parenthood (grandparenthood in my parents' case) and could not ask for more. Sleepless nights and first time parent's argument are all worth it when the twin flash us their untimely baby smile here and there when being attended to.
I pray to God to give me enough time to see the girls grow up to be someone strong, recognized in His heaven's community, in their lifetime and in the hereafter, and I am looking forward to be a better person because of them.
My favorite mantra in this journey is; 'Strong women...may we know them, may we be them, may we raise them'.
Amin.
 |
| Our bundle of joy |
Tuesday, December 27, 2016
to thousand sixteen
Time to reflect of 2016.
Alhamdulillah, a pretty good year.
Got married to the most beautiful man on earth,
with the most beautiful smile, the purest heart there is.
Got the opportunity to brush up this rusty brain
bit by bit, got promoted in less than a year in the new place,
and the chance to learn new things again.
Falling in love with something called work was unimaginable
before, but this year it's something to look forward to
everyday (put the annoying people aside).
The in-laws are in the perfect terms with mine,
got to stay at each other's places for the first time.
Got to experience each other's cultures and appreciate
each other's differences at the same time.
Alhamdulillah alhamdulillah.
Not to forget the whole clan got to be in Japan
altogether for the first time. Mom and dad got to experience
their first autumn and the siblings got to ski and snowboard,
all 4 of us together for the first time.
Alhamdulillah.
Due to getting promoted alhamdulillah got to live in a place
of my dreams in the countryside, where the sun shines right
into the bedroom every morning and the sunset got to be watched
from the balcony while sipping hubby's home made coffee during
the evening.
Bought and built and painted our furnitures, with just the two of us.
Learned to cook and clean and do the laundry for two together,
and the most important one was to learn to share.
Alhamdulillah alhamdulillah.
Bought our first car this year, a used one, but a very strong one.
One who did (and still) not break a sweat to be used in the hot summer days
as well as in the coldest winter. One who still cooperates when
used to go across 260km once a week to satisfy our cravings of certain
(classified) food in the city.
Of course there are some hiccups along the way, thus making way for
the dark side of us appear uninvited. Here's something I put in a form of
list to take up for a better future in 2017, a better insyaAllah.
Things that I'd like to take up are..(not according to sequence)
Åöend of 2016Åö
ŮZakat education for Adam, and Zakat at the mosque
Ůprepare a schedule for al-Quran reading for Adam
ŮSchool bags and stationaries for the needs
ŮSyria funds, mosque funds (you already have extra to give)
ŮTransfer data all pic into PC, start with S's 16GB
ŮSend 5 to mak, after resetting to NEW
Ůbaba's green tea
ŮSend the kids' suitcases to Narita
Å®
Åö2017Åö
ÅEDual citizenship (Japan)
ŮCitizenship right to apply to Chevening both from MY and JP!
ÅEChevening Scholarship for Masters
"Chevening Scholarships aim to support individuals to achieve
their professional aspirations.
The course and field of study should relate to your current
or future career goals."
Åôopen every August
Å@ Åômust have unconditional offer by Jul
ÅôCourses must be either nine or 12 months long
Åôfor taught master's degrees or selected short courses of
professional development only.
Åôfor taught master's degrees only.PhD or DPhil are not permitted
Åôfor study in the UK only.
ÅôFull-time
ÅôStart in the autumn term (usually September/October)
ŮSociety/Club
ŮSports/Games
ŮAwards/Recommendation(Patent Award!)
ŮVoluntary activities
ÅEBe fit and healthy all year
Ůeat healthy
Ůexercise everyday(treadmill on the way!insyaAllah)
Ůhike, new adventure
Ůhalf-marathon?
Ůbadminton, tennis?
ÅEBe thankful to people and surrounding
ŮRecycle, re-use
ŮAppreciation delivery for family and friends
ŮGet in touch during their anniversaries/birthdays/random
ÅETo have a better management thinking (of life-work balance)
Ůfrequent chess game with Adam
Ůor anyone else
Ůor online
ÅELily at Futurelearn
Ůcomplete one course at a time to train for Master's
Ůto train listening in English
Ůto get acquainted with fellow lecturers
Ůto familiarize English in higher forms
Ůto train for highest level in TOEFL, IELTS
ÅETo prepare welcome-home financial support
ŮBuy a house with a loan
ŮRent it out for Airbnb
ŮManagement by baba
ŮEvents by mama
ŮHelp from yaya and bibi and boboy
ÅEFund for the future kids
Ůput an aim of certain amount
Ůplan a schedule to stick
Ůdeclare a milestone at certain points in above schedule
ÅENafkah education for Adam
Ůprepare some material for Adam to easily understand
ÅEJune income
Ůfor Adam (50%)
ŮBosch's book
Ůfor Mak and baba (RM1000 each)
Ůfor the kids (RM300 each)
Å®
Å®
Å®
ÅEFund for Master's life (12 months)
Ůput an aim of certain amount
Ůplan a schedule to stick
Ůdeclare a milestone at certain points in above schedule
ÅEProfessional carrier
Ůbuild a resume from scratch
Ůupdate it by timeline
Ůrefer to other's linkedin if in trouble
Ůcreate every milestone achieve by date (year, place of event)
Ůthen create a milestone og goals
Ůcreate a pathway, set your steps right
ŮREFLECT it to the resume
Ůset a fixed date, to regularly update
Alhamdulillah, a pretty good year.
Got married to the most beautiful man on earth,
with the most beautiful smile, the purest heart there is.
Got the opportunity to brush up this rusty brain
bit by bit, got promoted in less than a year in the new place,
and the chance to learn new things again.
Falling in love with something called work was unimaginable
before, but this year it's something to look forward to
everyday (put the annoying people aside).
The in-laws are in the perfect terms with mine,
got to stay at each other's places for the first time.
Got to experience each other's cultures and appreciate
each other's differences at the same time.
Alhamdulillah alhamdulillah.
Not to forget the whole clan got to be in Japan
altogether for the first time. Mom and dad got to experience
their first autumn and the siblings got to ski and snowboard,
all 4 of us together for the first time.
Alhamdulillah.
Due to getting promoted alhamdulillah got to live in a place
of my dreams in the countryside, where the sun shines right
into the bedroom every morning and the sunset got to be watched
from the balcony while sipping hubby's home made coffee during
the evening.
Bought and built and painted our furnitures, with just the two of us.
Learned to cook and clean and do the laundry for two together,
and the most important one was to learn to share.
Alhamdulillah alhamdulillah.
Bought our first car this year, a used one, but a very strong one.
One who did (and still) not break a sweat to be used in the hot summer days
as well as in the coldest winter. One who still cooperates when
used to go across 260km once a week to satisfy our cravings of certain
(classified) food in the city.
Of course there are some hiccups along the way, thus making way for
the dark side of us appear uninvited. Here's something I put in a form of
list to take up for a better future in 2017, a better insyaAllah.
Things that I'd like to take up are..(not according to sequence)
Åöend of 2016Åö
ŮZakat education for Adam, and Zakat at the mosque
Ůprepare a schedule for al-Quran reading for Adam
ŮSchool bags and stationaries for the needs
ŮSyria funds, mosque funds (you already have extra to give)
ŮTransfer data all pic into PC, start with S's 16GB
ŮSend 5 to mak, after resetting to NEW
Ůbaba's green tea
ŮSend the kids' suitcases to Narita
Å®
Åö2017Åö
ÅEDual citizenship (Japan)
ŮCitizenship right to apply to Chevening both from MY and JP!
ÅEChevening Scholarship for Masters
"Chevening Scholarships aim to support individuals to achieve
their professional aspirations.
The course and field of study should relate to your current
or future career goals."
Åôopen every August
Å@ Åômust have unconditional offer by Jul
ÅôCourses must be either nine or 12 months long
Åôfor taught master's degrees or selected short courses of
professional development only.
Åôfor taught master's degrees only.PhD or DPhil are not permitted
Åôfor study in the UK only.
ÅôFull-time
ÅôStart in the autumn term (usually September/October)
ŮSociety/Club
ŮSports/Games
ŮAwards/Recommendation(Patent Award!)
ŮVoluntary activities
ÅEBe fit and healthy all year
Ůeat healthy
Ůexercise everyday(treadmill on the way!insyaAllah)
Ůhike, new adventure
Ůhalf-marathon?
Ůbadminton, tennis?
ÅEBe thankful to people and surrounding
ŮRecycle, re-use
ŮAppreciation delivery for family and friends
ŮGet in touch during their anniversaries/birthdays/random
ÅETo have a better management thinking (of life-work balance)
Ůfrequent chess game with Adam
Ůor anyone else
Ůor online
ÅELily at Futurelearn
Ůcomplete one course at a time to train for Master's
Ůto train listening in English
Ůto get acquainted with fellow lecturers
Ůto familiarize English in higher forms
Ůto train for highest level in TOEFL, IELTS
ÅETo prepare welcome-home financial support
ŮBuy a house with a loan
ŮRent it out for Airbnb
ŮManagement by baba
ŮEvents by mama
ŮHelp from yaya and bibi and boboy
ÅEFund for the future kids
Ůput an aim of certain amount
Ůplan a schedule to stick
Ůdeclare a milestone at certain points in above schedule
ÅENafkah education for Adam
Ůprepare some material for Adam to easily understand
ÅEJune income
Ůfor Adam (50%)
ŮBosch's book
Ůfor Mak and baba (RM1000 each)
Ůfor the kids (RM300 each)
Å®
Å®
Å®
ÅEFund for Master's life (12 months)
Ůput an aim of certain amount
Ůplan a schedule to stick
Ůdeclare a milestone at certain points in above schedule
ÅEProfessional carrier
Ůbuild a resume from scratch
Ůupdate it by timeline
Ůrefer to other's linkedin if in trouble
Ůcreate every milestone achieve by date (year, place of event)
Ůthen create a milestone og goals
Ůcreate a pathway, set your steps right
ŮREFLECT it to the resume
Ůset a fixed date, to regularly update
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)